


Countdown to You

by MusicPrincess655



Category: Free!
Genre: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, M/M, Polyamory, Romance, Soulmate-Identifying Timers, makoharu - Freeform, reigisa - Freeform, sourintori
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-04
Updated: 2015-09-19
Packaged: 2018-04-19 00:10:05
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 5,357
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4725425
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MusicPrincess655/pseuds/MusicPrincess655
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>So this isn't my original idea (link to what I think is the original tumblr post http://illness-and-instruments.tumblr.com/post/3139087743/timer-2009-if-a-clock-could-count-down-to-the) but I love the concept and I needed to practice writing angst.<br/>Makoto's never had a working soulmate timer, so he leans on his best friend to hide his sadness.<br/>Rin's happy with his soulmate, but they're missing something. Or someone.<br/>Nagisa is so excited to meet his soulmate, but what happens when his soulmate isn't interested in him?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. I Can't Remember Not Knowing You

Everyone was born with a timer on their wrist. That timer would count down the days, hours, minutes, seconds until you met your soulmate for the first time. Some people met in childhood, some in middle or high school, but for some unlucky souls, it wasn’t until well into adulthood that they finally found their soulmate.

For an even unluckier Makoto, it looked like he might never meet his. His timer, for as long as he could remember, had stood at 00:00:00:00. Zero days, zero hours, zero minutes, zero seconds until he met his soulmate. He had been hiding his wrist since he understood what that meant, almost from the time he was a toddler. It wasn’t hard, since it fit right below a watch, and if anyone thought that a toddler wearing a watch was strange, Makoto figured that someone with a faulty soulmate timer was even stranger.

Makoto’s mother was the only one that knew about this. She had gotten sick right after he was born, and his father had been so worried about her that neither of them had bothered to look at their newborn son’s soulmate timer. The first time she had looked was when they’d gotten out of the hospital, driven home by their neighbors the Nanase’s, and she’d noticed that her six day old baby was already supposed to have met his soulmate. She’d suggested, mostly in the spirit of trying to cheer Makoto up, that maybe he’d met his soulmate in the hospital, but did it even count if you were a baby?

Haru had never mentioned his own timer to Makoto, but Nagisa talked about it almost obsessively. Having actually agreed to do math, for once, he had figured out that he wouldn’t meet his soulmate until he was sixteen. He bemoaned this fact, loudly and often.

“Nagisa, come on, sixteen isn’t a bad age to meet your soulmate,” Makoto complained, finally losing a bit of his temper. “You’ll have the rest of your life with them, it will be much longer than the time you were apart.”

Rin, on the other hand, had a bit of a different situation. His would flash between two settings. One would have already been down to zero, and one was still counting. It would change between these two every couple of days. Although Rin claimed that he could remember a time when the zeroed timer had been counting, he wasn’t completely sure. Rin’s guess was that he had to be extra careful to catch his soulmate when the second timer turned to zero, or else he would miss them forever. Makoto wanted to be happy that, even though Rin’s was different, it seemed like he had every chance to find his soulmate, but it was hard to be happy for someone else’s hope when you had none of your own.

Despite being on a swim team together, he and Haru had never seen each other’s soulmate timers. Makoto had to admit to trying to peek every so often, but Haru always had his wrist turned in a way that kept Makoto from seeing. Likewise, Makoto had noticed Haru trying to catch a glimpse of his a few times, but he had become so good at hiding it that Haru had never seen his, either.

Haru and Makoto went to middle school, while Rin went off to Australia. Nagisa went to a different middle school a year after, and for a while, talk of the soulmate timers ceased. At least, until people began to find their soulmates. It wasn’t much in middle school, only maybe one or two a year, but every time it happened, Haru and Makoto sat in silence for at least the rest of the day. It was a taboo topic of conversation between the two of them. Makoto had his reasons for not telling Haru about his broken timer, but he wondered why Haru had never told him about his. They were best friends, and they knew pretty much everything about each other except for that. Makoto usually assumed that Haru’s was set much later in his life, and he was trying not to think about it until it was closer to time.

Maybe because both of them were unable to talk about their soulmate timers, they leaned on each other even more than before. They’d always been best friends and understood each other better than anyone else, but in middle school, they figured out that they could practically read each other’s minds. Makoto started to do most of the talking as Haru became more withdrawn, and they were practically inseparable. Sometimes, when they were both silent and sad because someone else had found their soulmate, they would hold hands as they walked home from school, not caring if anyone thought it was weird that two boys in middle school were holding hands.

As they began to grow taller and change towards the end of middle school, Makoto began to notice that Haru was really pretty, between his bright blue eyes, creamy skin, and fine features. Girls began to notice Haru, often giggling behind their hands and checking their wrists whenever he walked past. This bothered Makoto, for whatever reason.

Of course, it took Makoto a long time to realize that girls did the same to him, and Haru was just as bothered. They never talked about it, but they both knew that it was happening. Neither of them understood why.

They met back up with Nagisa in their second year of high school, when Nagisa’s meeting with his soulmate was fast approaching. He was a ball of nervous energy in the days leading up to his meeting with his soulmate, bringing up memories from childhood, and in the end, it was almost unfair that Makoto and Haru weren’t even with him when he stumbled across his soulmate, riding to school on the train.

Nagisa had been ecstatic, using the newfound bond to convince his soulmate, Rei, to join the swim team, getting them their required four members. Makoto had just smiled through his pain and told Nagisa that he was happy for him. He’d known the day when one of his best friends found the happiness he would never have was coming for a long time, but it still hadn’t prepared him for the hurt. Haru had just looked at the ground as he mumbled his congratulations.

Haru and Makoto were once again silent on the walk home, Haru’s hand in Makoto’s, and had Haru’s hands always been this much smaller than his own? Makoto fought back the tears until he was in the safety of his bedroom. He knew that Haru knew that he was upset, but Haru would never know why.

Not too much later, they met up with Rin again for the first time in years. He was much angrier, focused on beating Haru at swimming. However, finally meeting his soulmate had tempered him somewhat. After several months of getting over his angry obsession with beating Haru, he’d finally introduced all of them to his soulmate, Ai.

In the end, Ai had had the answer to the question of Rin’s timer. Ai, too, had always had two timers, flashing between the two of them. One had run down when he’d met Rin, and the other was still ticking. This must have meant that they had another soulmate, making their pair a trio. Rin assumed that it must have been a childhood friend of his, since he couldn’t really remember the first timer reaching zero.

Makoto, once again, fought back tears as he congratulated his friend. Haru, once again, didn’t look up as he offered his own congratulations.

However, Makoto finally had bigger problems to deal with than his own hidden sadness. Haru, he’d finally realized, was depressed, and Makoto had been enabling him for years. This had led to Haru having no idea where to go with his life, what he wanted to do after high school, and it was starting to affect the swim team, never mind their friendships.

And Makoto finally worked up the courage to say something to Haru. At a festival, standing under the fireworks, he pushed Haru farther than he’d ever pushed him before.

“Stop sticking your nose into other people’s business!” Haru shouted at him. “You’re so hung up on that damn soulmate timer, you’ve always been so stuck on it, that you’ve never been able to decide your own dreams!”

“I have decided!” Makoto shouted back, holding Haru’s wrist, the one without the timer. He let go of his wrist then, sighing as he saw Haru’s shocked expression. And he uttered the words that he knew had the potential to break his best friend, but that he knew had to be said anyway. “I’m going to a college in Tokyo to learn how to be a coach.”

Makoto could never describe what he saw in Haru’s eyes then, and he never wanted to, but he saw Haru…break. Something inside him just…left. Before Makoto could say anything else, Haru turned and fled. Makoto had called after him, but Haru’d just kept on running.

Makoto called Rin. Rin had always been better at forcing Haru out of his own head, challenging him, than Makoto had ever been. Rin had taken Haru with him to Australia, and Makoto had spent those days mourning the potential loss of the friendship that had been with him since before he could remember. He’d gone to meet them at the airport, and Haru’s eyes were nothing but apologetic. Makoto had felt relief as he’d realized that Haru wasn’t lost to him forever, and he’d offered his “Welcome home, Haru-chan” with a genuine smile. Haru’s face had softened at that as he replied “I’m home”.

Makoto was happy to learn that Haru had finally figured out what he was going to do after high school, and even happier that it was something Haru loved. They made up from their fight, and went on to place sixth at nationals.

A few months later, after Haru had accepted a scholarship from a university a train ride away from Makoto’s in Tokyo, they ended up back at the scene of their fight under the fireworks. It wasn’t a tense place for them anymore, having put all the reasons for their fight behind them. They wanted to have a better memory to leave this place with, since they were going to Tokyo soon.

“Makoto,” Haru turned his head, looking into Makoto’s eyes. “I’ve been wanting to ask you something…since we were kids, actually.”

“What?”

“You never talk about your soulmate timer, and you always hide it, so…why?”

Makoto laughed darkly to himself. He had started himself on the process of dealing with the fact that he might not have a soulmate, finally, probably much later than he should have. He took his watch off.

“It’s never been going,” he said, holding out his wrist to Haru, watching Haru’s eyes pop wide with shock. “Ever since I can remember, it’s been at zero.”

Wordlessly, for the first time Haru held his shaking wrist out to Makoto. Makoto closed his fingers around Haru’s hand to look down at his wrist. He felt a jolt as he realized that Haru’s was _exactly the same as his_!

“You’ve already met your soulmate?” Makoto gasped. “Who is it? Why did you never tell me?”

“It’s never been going,” Haru whispered. “I can’t remember it ever being different.”

“And I can’t remember a time when I didn’t know you,” Makoto gasped, realization hitting him. “Haru! When we met, I was six days old, and you were still a baby, too. That’s why our timers have always been at zero! They counted down before we were old enough to remember!”

Haru was staring at Makoto, wide eyed, open mouthed, and Makoto had always known that Haru was pretty, but had he always been this _beautiful?_ Had his eyes always had that many shades of blue in them? Had he ever looked so astonished?

Makoto tightened his grip around Haru’s hand, bringing the other up to shakily trace across Haru’s face. Haru sighed, closing his eyes at the contact. Makoto leaned in.

“Can I…is it okay if I kiss you?” Makoto asked breathlessly.

Haru nodded. His eyes said “ _I think I’ve wanted you to kiss me for a long time_.”

It was almost quick, very chaste, just a press of lips on lips before Makoto pulled back, smiling.

“This is everything I never thought I’d have,” Makoto grinned. Haru smiled one of his rare smiles, lacing his fingers together with Makoto’s. For someone who’d spent his entire life thinking he would be alone forever, Makoto was pretty surprised to find that he’d never been alone a day in his life.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Because I am a slut for MakoHaru, and an even bigger slut for the childhood friends to lovers trope. If I post another chapter, the next will be Rin's, since I have a lot of complex feelings about Rin that I need to work out (and boy will there be angst involved with him).


	2. I've Spent My Life Looking For You

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Time for the Rin chapter! I love Rin as a character, mostly because he’s complex, which might be why I gave him a complicated soulmate timer. Enjoy it as I try to write angst (because it's Rin so of course there's angst)!  
> Thanks a lot to the person who commented, you definitely made my day! Excuse any English mistakes I might make, I'm currently in Spain and I'm bad at switching between languages.

Rin had been an anomaly for as long as he could remember. He had, not one, but two soulmate timers. One of them, however, had already reached zero. He couldn’t remember if it had ever had time on it, but if it referred to a soulmate, then it was someone he’d already met.

The other, which would alternate with the first every few days, showed that he would meet his soulmate at the age of seventeen. He considered this a good age, and had always assumed that the first timer being at zero meant that if he missed his soulmate when the second reached zero, he would miss his soulmate forever. Even though when he went off to Australia, he had quite a bit of time left, he still felt nervous about keeping an eye on his timer to make sure he wouldn’t miss anything.

Fast forward to Rin’s second year of high school. He was a lot angrier than he had ever been as a child, heading off to Australia with high hopes. He was swimming again, but he had an obsession with beating Haru. It made him a bitter person, hiding the fact that he was still a bit of a crybaby, and would often cry himself to sleep when he knew no one could hear him.

He was finally close to the end of his second timer. On the day it was supposed to reach zero, he couldn’t bring himself to get out of bed, or even to stop staring at his wrist. He thought he should maybe get up and walk around, since the chances of him meeting his soulmate lying in his bed were slim to none, but he couldn’t tear his eyes away.

“Thirty seconds left,” he whispered to himself. He needed to get up.

 

 

Go find your soulmate, dumbass.

 

Fifteen.

 

You miss them now, you miss them forever.

 

GO NOW-

 

The door banged open. Rin looked up, and his mouth fell open as he took in what was probably the most beautiful boy he had ever seen.

“Oh no, I opened that way louder than I meant to, sorry…” the boy trailed off, holding a moving box in both of his arms as he took in Rin’s shocked expression. “Sorry, sorry, I didn’t mean to startle you, my name is Nitori Aiichirou and I guess I’m your roommate!”

“Look at your wrist,” Rin breathed. Nitori set the box in his arms down and looked at his wrist, freezing when he realized what Rin was talking about.

“You’re my first soulmate?” Nitori gasped, before flinging his arms around Rin’s waist in a hug. Rin reciprocated numbly.

“What do you mean, I’m your first?” he asked.

“I have two timers,” Nitori said, holding up his wrist just in time for Rin to see the zeros turn into a countdown for a year from now. “Is that weird?”

“I do too, but both of mine are at zero,” Rin told him. “I can’t remember when the first one reached zero, though.”

“So that means you already know our other soulmate,” Nitori nodded before smiling. “What’s your name, by the way?”

“Rin. Matsuoka Rin,” Rin choked out.

“Okay, Matsuoka-senpai!” Nitori said cheerfully.

“You can just call me Rin,” Rin said. “We’re soulmates, after all.”

“Okay, Rin-senpai!”

Rin had to roll his eyes at that. Nitori did grow on him, though. It was hard for him not to, since they were both on the swim team in addition to sharing a dorm. Nitori reminded him a little of his childhood friend Nagisa, but Nitori was gentle in a way that Nagisa was not, which only endeared him to Rin more.

However, it became immediately apparent that something was missing from their relationship. Rin was still angry and bitter, particularly after he met up with his childhood friends Haru, Makoto, and Nagisa for the first time in years and gained a false victory over Haru in a race. He could fly into a rage easily, he was moody and prone to fits of temper.

Nitori never knew how to deal with Rin when Rin was in one of his moods. He couldn’t seem to soothe Rin’s anger, despite his natural gentleness, mostly because Rin’s temper seemed to terrify him. He could often be reduced to tears between his frustration and his fear of Rin. It was obvious that they needed something to temper Rin, someone who could deal with Rin’s temper, while giving Nitori the emotional support he needed.

They worked on their relationship, though. It was hard going from the beginning. Nitori eventually dropped his habit of calling Rin “senpai” and Rin picked up the habit of calling Nitori by a nickname, Ai. Rin didn’t exactly stop flying off the handle, but he did learn to apologize to Ai whenever he did lose his temper. Ai eventually opened up to Rin and told him that the reason he was so scared of Rin’s temper was because Ai’s father had a temper as well.

Even though they got better, even though Rin started to get less angry and bitter, even though Ai got braver, they could still feel that their relationship wasn’t quite whole. Hopefully, that would change when they found their other soulmate.

The day was finally coming when Ai’s timer showed him meeting their other soulmate for the first time. He and Rin made plans to meet on Samezuka’s grounds and walk around, hopefully bringing them to whoever was the third in their trio. Ai was running late, though, and Rin was looking around, a strange combination of bored and antsy. That was when his eyes caught on someone familiar.

“Sousuke?” he asked. A pair of teal blue eyes met his, and the brooding face cracked a smile.

“Hello, Rin,” Sousuke said as they playfully performed their secret handshake.

“What are you doing here? I thought you went to school in Tokyo.”

“I did, but I already got scouted for a college. I came back here for my last year. I’m actually supposed to meet my soulmate today, but I’m not sure what I’m supposed to do.”

“They find you pretty much whatever you do,” Rin assured him. Sousuke looked at him for a minute before realization dawned on his face.

“You’ve already met your soulmate? Who is it?”

“Actually, there he is now. AI! GET OVER HERE!”

Ai came sprinting up, face slightly red.

“Sorry I’m late, Rin,” Ai panted.

“Ai, this is my friend Sousuke,” Rin introduced them. Sousuke’s eyes met Ai’s, and they both widened as they both glanced down at their wrists. Rin’s heart almost stopped. _Did that mean…?_

“You’re our other soulmate,” Ai gasped, before breaking out in a grin. Sousuke looked dumbfounded.

“All along, it was you?” Rin asked. “You’re the one I’ve been looking for my entire life?”

Rin moved dorm rooms to live with Sousuke, but made it clear to Ai that he was always welcome to spend the night, especially since Rin and Ai had become used to sharing a bunk. The relationship didn’t get better right away. In fact, it was harder for a while. Sousuke admitted to Rin that he’d had a crush on Rin for a long time, and he was jealous of Ai. Rin, rather than being the one who scared Ai, ended up being the one who protected him for a while.

Rin and Sousuke fell into old patterns easily, with the obvious chemistry that accompanies long-time friendship. Ai would often feel left out when one or the other would share a story about their childhood, laughing and saying “Remember when…?”

Rin, for perhaps the first time in his life, was the one paying mediator. Sousuke was willing to talk to Ai (occasionally) but he didn’t seem interested in a relationship, acting jealous around Rin, until Rin finally snapped.

“We are all soulmates!” he’d shouted, startling both of them out of the uneasy staring contest they’d been having. “I don’t know why you two are so jealous of each other, but we’re all in this relationship together. You don’t have to be jealous, because we’re all dating each other! I love both of you, but I can’t take any more of this!”

Rin had had the solution, too. He kicked Ai out of his and Momo’s shared room, switching places with Ai. His plan was to have Ai and Sousuke share a room until they were more comfortable with each other. Of course, that meant that he had to put up with Momo while Ai and Sousuke dealt with their issues, but he was willing to do that if it meant his soulmates would start to like each other.

This had gone on for about a week, and Rin had noticed Ai with tear tracks on his face more than once. He was starting to question how well his plan was really going to work, when one day at swim practice Sousuke walked up next to him.

“He’s pretty cute, isn’t he?” Sousuke said, as they both watched Ai swim, his time steadily improving.

“He grows on you fast, doesn’t he?” Rin laughed. “I couldn’t get along with him at all when we first became roommates. We were too different, at first. But he’s really cute, and he’s really nice, and we got a lot better. We had to do a lot of work on the whole relationship thing, though. We’ve both been waiting for you. It’s not the same with just the two of us.”

“I should apologize to him, shouldn’t I?” It was more of a statement than a question.

“If it makes you feel any better, I used to have to apologize to him once or twice a week because I’d lose my temper and yell. Usually I wasn’t even mad at…him…” Rin trailed off as he caught the shocked look Sousuke was giving him.

“How could you possibly yell at him?” Sousuke asked. “I mean, yeah, I was jealous of him, but I was never mad enough to yell at him, that would be like kicking a puppy. Have you seen his face? I couldn’t yell at that.”

It turned out, Sousuke was exactly what Ai and Rin had needed to round out their relationship. He was perfectly practiced in dealing with Rin, and while he had his bad days as well, he didn’t have the same fiery rage as Rin that scared Ai. Rin moved back into their room, where Ai slept over almost every night.

And yes, Rin still occasionally lost his temper, but Sousuke would just snort and say “calm down, princess, you’re scaring Ai” with his arm around Ai’s shoulders, Ai curled into his side. Ai would still be afraid of some things and uncertain about himself, but Sousuke and Rin learned to work together to give him emotional support and raise his self-esteem. Sousuke would sometimes have a hard time talking about his feelings and thoughts, but Rin and Ai quickly learned to read his moods and give him extra attention or extra space, depending on what he needed.

They had spent the first part of their lives looking for each other, and now that they were finally all together, their future looked bright.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I love Rin and just want him to be happy, give him all the hugs (and two soulmates because OT3 I guess). Up next is Reigisa, and I promise it will be nothing but tooth-rotting fluff because I can’t bear to bring pain to my sunshine child and nerd son.


	3. I've Been Waiting For You

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am so sorry. I promised fluff and this might be the most angst-y chapter in the entire thing. Don't worry, good endings for everyone!

Nagisa was on the train, on his way to school, bouncing in his seat. His soulmate timer had nearly counted down, and he was just hoping he had time to get off the crowded train before it reached zero. However, that wasn’t looking likely. The image he’d always had in his head, of him and his soulmate meeting eyes for the first time as their timers reached zero, falling into each other’s arms, might not work out.

Still, he couldn’t wait to meet his soulmate. He almost knocked over the bag of swim team recruitment stuff sitting next to him with his nervous energy. He looked down at his wrist, watched as the timer finally, _finally_ stopped ticking. He looked up.

Standing in front of him was a boy that Nagisa recognized from his class, but had never spoken to. Tall, built like an athlete, blue hair, purple eyes hidden behind glasses, head tucked into a book, not even looking at his timer.

“Ryugazaki-kun?” Nagisa spoke up, making the purple eyes meet his.

“Yes, Hazuki-san? I hope you’re not going to try to convince me to join the swim club. I’ve already joined another club.”

“Well…I mean yes, but…could you please look at your wrist?” Nagisa asked. This was _definitely_ not going how he’d pictured it. Ryugazaki obliged, looking down at his wrist with what could only be described as clinical indifference.

“Ah. It would appear that we are soulmates,” Ryugazaki said, his voice barely changing. “I apologize, but I am uninterested in something as illogical as love. I wish you the best in finding someone else.”

“Wait…but…” Nagisa felt like all of the air had been squeezed out of his lungs. _This wasn’t what was supposed to happen_.

“This is my stop,” Ryugazaki said, stepping off the train, ignoring Nagisa’s desolate look. Nagisa stared out of the train window, watching the boy who was supposed to be his soulmate run the rest of the way to school.

Nagisa tried not to show how upset he was when he saw Haru and Makoto at swim practice after school, but they were childhood friends, and they noticed immediately. Nagisa tried to tell them calmly what had happened, but his eyes filled with tears, and soon he was shaking with sobs, grateful for the fact that the pool was far enough away from everyone that no one would hear him but Haru and Makoto.

That was when Makoto wrapped Nagisa up in his arms. Makoto had always been the most caring of their friend group, so this wasn’t a surprise. What did make him jump was the hand on his shoulder blade, rubbing his back. Haru wasn’t much of one for physical affection, especially for anyone who wasn’t Makoto, but when Nagisa looked up, he could see the concern in Haru’s eyes. The two comforted him until he stopped crying, and he said that he still wanted to do swim practice today.

A few days later, Nagisa followed Ryugazaki, who he’d switched to calling Rei-chan in his head, off the train for his daily run to school.

“What do you think you’re doing? I told you, I won’t join the swim club,” Rei cast over his shoulder.

“This isn’t about the swim club!” Nagisa almost shouted, loud enough to make Rei stop. “This is about us being soulmates and you ignoring me!”

“I already told you, I’m not interested in love,” Rei shot back.

“Would you at least be my friend?” Nagisa asked. That made Rei pause.

“I suppose…there would be nothing wrong with friendship…” Rei said slowly.

And so, they began a kind of friendship. Nagisa eventually convinced Rei to join the swim team. Rei became accustomed to Nagisa’s habit of calling everyone –chan and hanging onto his friends. Rei learned the strokes, and Rin told Nagisa that he’d worked the hardest on breaststroke. When Nagisa ran away from home because his parents wanted him to quit the swim team, Rei was the one comforting Nagisa and offering to help him study. They spent a lot of time together after that, at first just studying, but then hanging out, watching movies, sharing snacks, a few times throwing pillows at each other because Nagisa loved making Rei laugh. They were best friends, fitting together surprisingly well despite the difference in their personalities.

This friendship came to a head, however, when Nagisa brought up being soulmates again. Rei instantly shut down, retreating behind logic.

“Nagisa-kun, I told you that I am uninterested in love. I am happy with our friendship, but dating would be illogical.”

“Bullshit!” Nagisa shrieked, making Rei jump, both from the volume and the curse. Nagisa rarely swore. “I know you have feelings for me! I’m not an idiot, I can see them! All you ever say is that love is too illogical, but I don’t think you mean that. Why do you keep rejecting me?”

“You wouldn’t be happy in a relationship with me.”

“WHY NOT?!” Nagisa hadn’t even realized that his voice could go that high or that loud. Rei was looking down at his feet, rubbing his arm.

“I am…I am asexual, Nagisa-kun,” Rei said in a whisper. Nagisa waited for him to go on, but realized that was all he had to say.

“Wait…that’s it?”

“What do you mean, that’s it?” Rei asked, looking astonished. “I cannot feel a desire for physical intimacy, and all you say is ‘that’s it’?”

“Why would that keep me from having a relationship with you?” Nagisa was legitimately confused. Was that really all that was keeping Rei from dating him?

“Isn’t the whole point of relationships to eventually get married and have children?” Rei looked confused now.

“No! The point of relationships is that people love each other enough to want to be around each other all the time and be close to each other and be special to each other! Besides, we’re both boys, we couldn’t have our own children anyway.”

“You really…you don’t care that we would never be physically intimate?” Rei breathed.

“Well…is it okay if I hold your hand?” Nagisa asked.

“Yes,” Rei answered, and Nagisa took his hand.

“Is it okay if I hug you?”

“Yes.” And Nagisa wrapped his other arm around Rei’s waist.

“Is it okay if I kiss you?”

“Y-yes.”

And Nagisa stretched up on his toes, gently pressing his lips to Rei’s, a chaste first kiss.

“Then that’s all I need,” Nagisa said as he pulled away. “Tell me if I’m going too far, and I’ll back off. But as long as I can hold your hand and hug you and kiss you, I don’t need anything else. As long as you’re mine and no one else’s, I’ll be happy.”

They started dating, and Nagisa was finally happy. He was even more clingy with Rei, but in a very nonsexual way. Very rarely did they walk anywhere without holding hands. A few times, later in the relationship when they started kissing more, Rei had to ask Nagisa for more space because Nagisa had gotten just a little too close, and Nagisa always backed down, smiling as he stepped away, because even though they’d stopped, Nagisa was glad that Rei trusted him enough to let him get as close as he’d gotten.

As they got older, graduating from college and moving in together, they had sex a few, a very few, times when Rei said that it was okay. It wasn’t regular by any means, and Nagisa never asked for it, instead waiting for Rei to come to him. Sometimes Rei was surprised that Nagisa never seemed upset about the lack of sex, but Nagisa just smiled and said that as long as Rei loved him, he didn’t need it.

They hit a few bumps along the way, but they were always able to work it out, because despite their different personalities, they loved each other enough to talk about their problems. Nagisa couldn’t be happier with the boy he’d been waiting for from the moment he knew what a soulmate timer was.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I thought I was going to make this fluffy, but I started this whole fic as an exercise in writing angst and also because I was tired of soulmate aus where the characters meet and it's like they're instantly married. So this was kind of an exploration for me into how a more realistic soulmate situation would work, how, even if you knew you were meant for each other, you would go about forging your relationship. Thanks to everyone who read, commented, and stuck with it.


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